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Tips to Raising Happy Kids

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I am a big Law of Attraction believer and that got me thinking about ‘The Secret’ for kids. Seriously though we all know children are our future, right? That is why this article I found called Tips to Raising Happy Kids is so relevant

So why shouldn’t they learn ‘The Secret’ from an early age and experience the blessings of the universe.

This stuff isn’t taught in any schools I know of and I believe it should be.

As parents and grand-parents it is up to us to raise happy, healthy well adjusted kids who are primed for success for life as adults.

If we fail to teach them life’s biggest lessons we are failing the future of humanity.

I came across this fantastic article and thought I would share it with you.

Tips to Raising Happy Kids

By Winsome Coutts

As a grandmother and self-help writer, I’m often asked by readers, “How do you raise happy kids?” This is a question near and dear to every loving parent’s heart. No matter what we teach them, if we haven’t taught them how to be happy, or can’t parent in a way that makes them feel happy, it’s rather all for naught, isn’t it? So it’s a very pertinent question.

Tips to Raising Happy Kids - sisters huggingI’ve been blessed with having two happy children and two happy grandchildren. I applied certain principles in raising my kids, and see my son and daughter-in-law apply the same in raising their adorable daughters, Klara and Stina. In this article, I’ll share two tips I’ve learned along the way.

The first is the importance of modelling happiness. You can’t give something you don’t have. How can you teach kids happiness if you don’t have it yourself? Some parents think loving their family means living only for them, driving them everywhere, cleaning up after them, and putting their kids’ needs and desires way ahead of their own. Parenting shouldn’t turn us into a short-order restaurant or a cleaning or taxi service. It does for some parents. That teaches kids a bad lesson.

A child who perceives his parent as a servant, someone whose life has meaning only through catering to his whims, learns to be selfish. He comes to believe others exist to do his bidding. I have a friend who was raised like that, and she tells me when she grew up, she kept having the strange feeling, “Where are all the servants?” Being catered to was such an ingrained part of her childhood that adjusting to adulthood was difficult for her, because “the servants” were missing.

Kids who are raised this way tend to feel the world owes them a living. So breaking out of the “doormat” mode, if you’re in one, is pretty central to giving your kid a chance at a smooth transition to happy adulthood.Tips to Raising Happy Kids - flexing

When you take care of yourself, make time for yourself, and do things that make you happy, your child learns those behaviours from you. If she sees you going for your dreams and making decisions based on your inner truth, she learns that doing those things is good. On the other hand, if you model dropping everything to fulfill her latest dictate, she learns that parenting means self-denial and victimization. She may then become a self-effacing parent herself or go the other extreme and forego parenting entirely because it looks like such a sacrifice.

So to raise happy kids, be good to yourself. Treat yourself with respect and dignity the same as you treat your child. Don’t allow disrespect toward you any more than you’d allow someone to be rude to your kids. Make time for your creative desires and dreams. Plan in some scheduled personal time each week (or day), and make sure that you take it.

Let your kids see you’re doing this, and tell them the reason: “Mommy needs to have some fun, too,” or “Moms need time every day to relax.” This shows your child that you value yourself, and that personal time is important to everyone’s happiness.

The second tip I’ve learned for raising happy kids is the tremendous value of focused attention. The best form this can take is uninterrupted, one-on-one personal time with your child. Think back to your own childhood and some of your happiest memories. Chances are they include that hike you took with Dad, or the time you and Mom went to the restaurant for a dessert.

When we set aside an hour or two to be with our child, away from distractions and interruptions, we tell him he is important and loved. Giving focused attention is much more powerful than the diffused attention kids get while we cook dinner, drive them somewhere, or break up conversations to take calls on our cell phone.Tips to Raising Happy Kids - family activity

Children thrive on loving, focused, personal attention the way plants thrive on sunshine. Structure in some focused attention every day, even if it’s only for five or ten minutes. Look at your child when he talks to you, so he knows you’re completely with him. In love, it’s the subtle things that count.

Giving focused attention teaches self-worth: your child knows she’s valuable because you value her, enough to carve out time for you and her, uninterrupted by the world, for those moments. That spells love, and when she knows you love her, by your actions not your words, that brings security and heart fulfillment, essential foundations of happiness.

In this busy world where parents work two jobs and where kids’ social calendars can rival those of debutantes, it isn’t easy to make time to take care of yourself and uninterrupted time for you and your child. But for happiness, nothing could be more important. Think about your schedule, what is nonessential that you can cut out, or wasted moments that you can eliminate. Use that harvested time to be good to you and your kid. Your child’s happiness, and yours, depend on it.

Winsome Coutts holds a teacher’s certificate in education and has written hundreds of articles on self-development. She has studied with Bob Proctor and John Demartini, popular teachers featured on “The Secret” DVD. She is the passion behind the www.4lifehappykids.com and is a parent and grandparent.

Winsome is author of “Go for Your Goals” for kids – a set of downloadable e-books that guide your child through the joyful steps of learning visualization, goal-setting and the Law of Attraction. Simple language enhanced with beautiful illustrations and worksheets make these books appealing and motivating. To learn more, visit www.4lifehappykids.com

I found this article inspiring, what are your thoughts? Do you have any tips for the rest of us? Please leave your thoughts and ideas in the comment section below. I am looking forward to hearing your views. Take care.

This page contains some affiliate links that means I receive a small commission if you decide to make a purchase through the links on this page. This is cost free to you and will not add additional cost for you.

 


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Deborah

2 Comments

  1. Thank you so much for this article full of useful tips. It is true that childen live in a whole other world and we need to understand their way of thinking, but most importantly we must show them that we are equal. Really loved your tip on making them understand that Mommy needs to have some fun, too, It is much beter than getting angry and screaming at your kids when you are tired.

    • Thank you for the comment Nadia, I am happy you found this article useful. We all need time for ourselves and taking time for Mommy to pursue her own interests teaches children that self care is important. When my kids were small and I found myself stressed and overwhelmed I would tell the kids to go play in their rooms for a while or watch TV until Mommy feels better. This avoided me yelling and them crying many times. It also taught them that sometimes even adults need time out to calm their feelings. Take care of yourself my friend.

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